ð Funny Riddles
Silly riddles about animals, food and school. Guess the punchline, then groan and giggle.
How to play
- Pick a set of riddles. Silly Animals is open first, and stars open the rest.
- In Think, then reveal, say your answer out loud, press the button and see the punchline.
- Be honest: press Got it! if you were right.
- Prefer choices? Pick the answer gives you four punchlines to choose from.
- Press Read it to hear a riddle out loud, which is great for younger players.
- Collect stars, then try your favourite riddles on your family.
Funny riddles to make the whole family groan
Funny Riddles is a free game with over 150 silly riddles for kids, parents and anyone who loves a terrible joke. Each one is a little puzzle with a punchline, and half the fun is working out the pun before the answer pops up. It plays in your web browser with no download. All the riddles and answers are also listed on this page, so you can read them at the dinner table, in the car or in class.
Why kids love riddle jokes
A funny riddle is a joke that you get to solve. Children have to think about what words sound like and what else they could mean, and that wordplay is a real boost for language skills as well as a good laugh. When a child gets that "cantaloupe" sounds like "can't elope", or that a bear with no teeth is a gummy bear, they are playing with sounds and meanings the way good readers do. Then they tell it to everyone they meet, again and again.
Two ways to play
In Think, then reveal there are no choices, just like telling jokes with a friend. Say your guess, show the punchline, then be honest about whether you got it. It works perfectly with a group: let one person hold the device and read the riddles to the others. In Pick the answer, four punchlines are shown and you choose one, which is often funny all by itself and is a good way in for younger players. The Read it button reads the riddle out loud on devices that support it.
Four sets of silly
Silly Animals has cows, cats and very confused chickens. Food Fun has fruit, pizza and noodles that aren't what they seem. School Giggles has teachers, rulers and riddles about math. Daft Everyday Things has doors, socks and bicycles. Each round deals riddles you haven't seen yet, so there is always a new groan coming.
Funny animal riddles with answers
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Answer: A gummy bear. No teeth, all gums.
Why do cows wear bells?
Answer: Because their horns don't work. Moo-ve over, here comes a cow.
What do you call a sleeping bull?
Answer: A bulldozer. A bull that dozes.
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?
Answer: A pie-thon. Sounds just like python.
What's a cat's favourite colour?
Answer: Purr-ple. It makes them purr.
What do you call a fish without eyes?
Answer: A fsh. No I in it, so to speak.
How do you stop an elephant from charging?
Answer: Take away its credit card. It can't charge anything then.
Why don't elephants use computers?
Answer: They are afraid of the mouse. Even a computer mouse is too much.
What do you call a dog magician?
Answer: A labracadabrador. Abracadabra, meets labrador.
Why did the chicken join the band?
Answer: Because it had the drumsticks. Every drummer needs drumsticks.
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Answer: An investigator. An alligator in a vest. Say it fast.
What do cows read every morning?
Answer: The moos-paper. All the moos that's fit to print.
Where do sheep go for a haircut?
Answer: The baa-baa shop. Baa baa, barber.
What do you call a pig that knows karate?
Answer: A pork chop. Hi-yah!
What do you call a duck that gets all As?
Answer: A wise quacker. Quack, quack, smart aleck.
What do you get from a pampered cow?
Answer: Spoiled milk. A spoiled cow gives spoiled milk.
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
Answer: A carrot. Say both words out loud.
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Answer: They use honeycombs. A comb full of honey.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Answer: Ground beef. It just lies on the ground.
What do you call a cow that eats your grass?
Answer: A lawn moo-er. Moo goes the lawn.
Why are fish so smart?
Answer: They live in schools. They are in school all day.
How do you make a goldfish old?
Answer: Take away the G. Goldfish minus G is oldfish.
Why did the cat sit on the computer?
Answer: To keep an eye on the mouse. A cat will always keep an eye on a mouse.
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
Answer: A dino-snore. Listen to that snoring.
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for school?
Answer: Bison. Bison sounds just like "bye, son".
What do you call a dinosaur with bad eyesight?
Answer: A do-you-think-he-saurus. Do you think he saw us?
What kind of key opens a banana?
Answer: A monkey. A monkey knows just how to peel one.
Where do polar bears vote?
Answer: The North Poll. It sounds like the North Pole.
What goes tick-tock, woof-woof?
Answer: A watchdog. A watch and a dog at the same time.
What is a frog's favourite drink?
Answer: Croak-a-cola. Ice cold and hoppy.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
Answer: A pouch potato. It sits in its pouch all day.
What do you call an owl who does magic?
Answer: Hoo-dini. Hoo, hoo, abracadabra.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Answer: If they flew over the bay they'd be bagels. Bay gulls. Bagels. Get it?
Funny food riddles with answers
Why did the tomato blush?
Answer: It saw the salad dressing. Salad dressing. Dressing. Oh my!
What did one plate say to the other?
Answer: Dinner's on me. Plates are very generous.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Answer: It wasn't peeling well. Poor banana.
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Answer: Nacho cheese. Not your cheese.
What kind of nut has a hole in it?
Answer: A doughnut. A sweet sort of nut.
What's the best thing to put in a pie?
Answer: Your teeth. It's hard to eat otherwise.
What do you call a fake noodle?
Answer: An impasta. It's just pretending to be pasta.
Why did the cookie go to the nurse?
Answer: It felt crummy. Crumbs are never a good sign.
What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
Answer: It let out a little whine. Grapes make wine, and squashed ones whine.
What's a ghost's favourite dessert?
Answer: I-scream. Say "I scream" out loud.
What's a pirate's favourite food?
Answer: Arrrr-tichokes. Arrrr you hungry?
Why did the orange stop halfway up the hill?
Answer: It ran out of juice. Oranges run on juice, of course.
What do you give a sick lemon?
Answer: Lemon aid. First aid for fruit.
What did the mayo say when the fridge door opened?
Answer: Close the door, I'm dressing. Hello! Excuse me!
What's the best way to carve wood?
Answer: Whittle by whittle. It sounds just like little by little.
Why did the bread go to therapy?
Answer: It was feeling crusty. It kneaded someone to talk to.
What did the egg say to the frying pan?
Answer: You crack me up. Eggs have a great sense of humour.
Why was the math book so sad at lunch?
Answer: It had too many problems. Even a sandwich couldn't help.
What did the teddy bear say after dinner?
Answer: I'm stuffed. Teddy bears always are.
What is a scarecrow's favourite fruit?
Answer: Straw-berries. Straw through and through.
What do you call a sad strawberry?
Answer: A blueberry. A very sad berry feels blue.
Why don't eggs tell jokes?
Answer: They would crack each other up. And then it would be a real mess.
How do you fix a broken pizza?
Answer: With tomato paste. Paste sticks things together.
What did the hamburger name its daughter?
Answer: Patty. Hamburgers are very traditional.
Why do melons have big weddings?
Answer: They cantaloupe. They "can't elope". Cantaloupe.
What vegetable would you find in a plumber's kitchen?
Answer: A leek. Plumbers fix leaks. Leeks. Leaks.
What's small, round and giggles a lot?
Answer: A tickled onion. It's like a pickled onion, but happier.
Why did the student eat his homework?
Answer: His teacher said it was a piece of cake. He took her at her word.
What kind of tree fits in your hand?
Answer: A palm tree. It's right there on your hand.
Funny school riddles with answers
Why did the student bring a ladder to class?
Answer: To go to high school. Climb on up.
What is a teacher's favourite nation?
Answer: Expla-nation. They do love an explanation.
Why did the music teacher need a ladder?
Answer: To reach the high notes. A high note can be a long way up.
What did the pencil say to the other pencil?
Answer: You're looking sharp. Very good manners, for a pencil.
Why was the broom late for school?
Answer: It over-swept. It slept in.
What's the king of all school supplies?
Answer: The ruler. Long live the ruler!
Why did the clock get sent to the principal's office?
Answer: For tocking too much. It would not stop tocking in class.
What is a snake's best subject?
Answer: Hiss-tory. Sssso much to learn.
Why did the kid sit on his watch?
Answer: He wanted to be on time. And he was, in a way.
What is the longest word in the world?
Answer: Smiles. There's a mile between the first and last letter.
What do elves learn in school?
Answer: The elf-abet. A, B, C, D, elf.
What kind of school do giraffes go to?
Answer: High school. They are tall enough.
What's the world's tallest building?
Answer: The library. It has the most stories.
What did the calculator say to the student?
Answer: You can count on me. A very reliable friend.
What is a witch's favourite subject?
Answer: Spelling. She is really good at spells.
Why don't you do math in the jungle?
Answer: If you add four and four, you get ate. 4 + 4 = ate.
Why was six afraid of seven?
Answer: Because seven ate nine. 7, 8 (ate), 9. Poor nine.
Why was the geometry book so stressed?
Answer: It had too many angles. You can look at it from any of them.
What did zero say to eight?
Answer: Nice belt. An eight looks like a zero with a belt on.
What is a math teacher's favourite place?
Answer: Times Square. Multiplication, then squares.
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Answer: Her students were so bright. Those students must have been brilliant.
What's the best place to grow flowers at school?
Answer: In kindergarten. The word means "children's garden".
What is the hardest thing about learning to ride a bike?
Answer: The ground. Hard, indeed.
What do you call a number that can't sit still?
Answer: A roamin' numeral. Roman numerals go roaming.
Why was the equal sign so humble?
Answer: It knew it wasn't less than or greater than anyone else. What a modest little sign.
What's a math teacher's favourite dessert?
Answer: Pi. About 3.14 slices, please.
Why did the two 4s skip lunch?
Answer: They already 8. 4 + 4 = 8. They ate.
What did the triangle say to the circle?
Answer: You're pointless. A circle has no points at all.
Why was the obtuse angle so upset?
Answer: It was never right. An obtuse angle is more than a right angle.
What tool do you use in math class?
Answer: Multi-pliers. Very handy for times tables.
Why did the boy throw his clock out of the window?
Answer: He wanted to see time fly. Duck!
What's a pirate's favourite letter?
Answer: You'd think it's R, but it's the C. A pirate's first love is the sea.
What's an owl's favourite subject?
Answer: Owl-gebra. Hoo knew?
What's a moth's favourite subject?
Answer: Mothematics. It really adds up.
Why can't you trust atoms?
Answer: They make up everything. And they never stop.
What did one volcano say to the other?
Answer: I lava you. What a hot-headed romance.
Why did the student bring scissors to school?
Answer: To cut class. Please don't try this.
How did the music teacher get locked out of the classroom?
Answer: The keys were in the piano. So many keys, and none of them worked.
Where do pencils go on vacation?
Answer: Pencil-vania. It's very sharp at this time of year.
Which letter is the coolest?
Answer: Iced T. Served with lemon.
Which letter stings?
Answer: B. Buzz off!
How do bees get to school?
Answer: On the school buzz. Sit down and bee quiet.
What did the glue say to the paper?
Answer: I'm stuck on you. It's a very sticky friendship.
What is a ghost's favourite subject?
Answer: Boo-ology. It's the study of living things, ironically.
What's a cow's favourite subject?
Answer: Moo-sic. It's outstanding in the field.
Funny riddles for all ages, with answers
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Answer: Nothing, it just waved. Oceans are polite but quiet.
Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
Answer: Because then it would be a foot. 12 inches make a foot.
What has four wheels and flies?
Answer: A garbage truck. Flies, as in the insects.
Why was the computer cold?
Answer: It left its Windows open. Windows, get it?
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
Answer: A stick. Just a stick, really.
What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Answer: Between you and me, something smells. A nose knows.
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Answer: Cliff. It might be a good place to land.
What did one wall say to the other?
Answer: I'll meet you at the corner. That's where the walls join.
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Answer: It was two-tired. It has two tyres and it's too tired.
What kind of room has no walls?
Answer: A mushroom. Room in name only.
What's brown and sticky?
Answer: A stick. It's brown and it's stick-y.
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
Answer: Supplies. "Surprise!" but with mops.
What's the easiest way to count cows?
Answer: With a cow-culator. That's moo-th for you.
Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
Answer: He wanted cold hard cash. Very cold and very hard.
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
Answer: Sneakers. Sneaking is part of the job.
How do you make an egg roll?
Answer: Push it. Very gently.
What do you call a line of rabbits walking backward?
Answer: A receding hare line. Goes back and back.
What did the stamp say to the envelope?
Answer: Stick with me and we'll go places. And they did.
What do lawyers wear to court?
Answer: Lawsuits. A very smart suit.
What did the big flower say to the little flower?
Answer: Hi, bud. Flowers are friendly to their buds.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
Answer: An abdominal snowman. Like the abominable snowman, but with abs.
What kind of music do balloons hate?
Answer: Pop. Pop is a very bad word for a balloon.
Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of socks?
Answer: In case he got a hole in one. A hole in one sock, that is.
How does the moon cut its hair?
Answer: Eclipse it. "Eclipse it" sounds like "he clips it".
Why did the picture go to jail?
Answer: It was framed. It says it's innocent.
What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
Answer: A waist of time. A waist. Get it?
What did the traffic light say to the car?
Answer: Don't look, I'm changing. Traffic lights are very shy.
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Answer: He was outstanding in his field. Standing out, in a field.
What did the blanket say to the bed?
Answer: I've got you covered. A very reliable friend.
Why are ghosts such bad liars?
Answer: You can see right through them. See?
What do you call a train that sneezes?
Answer: An achoo-choo train. Bless you!
What did the sock say to the foot?
Answer: You're putting me on. Good one, sock.
What did the hat say to the scarf?
Answer: You hang around, I'll go on ahead. A hat is always one step above.
Why don't skeletons fight each other?
Answer: They don't have the guts. Not one bit of courage.
What do you call a snowman in summer?
Answer: A puddle. Poor fellow.
What's a tornado's favourite game?
Answer: Twister. It always gets very mixed up.
What did the cloud say to the lightning bolt?
Answer: You're shocking. Thunder agreed.
What do you call a shoe made of banana?
Answer: A slipper. Watch your step.
How does a scientist freshen her breath?
Answer: With experi-mints. Very fresh results.
Why did the robot go on vacation?
Answer: To recharge its batteries. Everyone needs a break.
Why are mountains so funny?
Answer: They're hill-arious. Peak comedy.
Why did the sun go to school?
Answer: To get brighter. It's already a star.
What do you call a bee that can't make up its mind?
Answer: A may-bee. Possibly.
Why did the computer go to the doctor?
Answer: It had a virus. It was feeling a bit run down.
More riddles and games
When you're ready for a harder challenge, try Hard Riddles Challenge, Riddle Rush or Word Riddles. For more silliness, spin the Would-You-Rather Wheel. Every quiz and puzzle is on the Brain Games page.
Free and safe
Funny Riddles is free to play, with no download, no sign-up and nothing to buy. There is no chat, and your stars are saved only on your own device. See the Parents & Safety page for more.
Frequently asked questions
What are some funny riddles for kids?
Try this one: what do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear! Or: why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine. You will find over 150 more on this page.
Are these funny riddles OK for young children?
Yes. They are silly and family-friendly. The Read it button and the Think, then reveal mode make them easy to enjoy with children who are still learning to read.
How do I play with a group?
Choose Think, then reveal. One person reads the riddle aloud, everyone guesses and then the reader shows the answer.
Can I print the riddles?
Yes. The print buttons above the lists make a sheet with or without the answers.
Is Funny Riddles free?
Yes. It is free to play in the browser with no download, no account and nothing to buy.